Ich bin ...

What am I?
Confused - I don't know where I am going.
Scared - It seems to me I would be hated by more people than loved finally
Honest - I don't wanna keep things hidden under veils from anyone, but can I help it?
Selfish - who isn't?
Genuine - I mean it! :-)
Sensitive - Too much for my own good, I've been told
Lazy - Have to get myself to overcome this trait, i really do
Brooding - Get over it Rahul, think ahead, think positive. duh?

Loving - yes I am, am sure of that. But I expect so much in return, oh thats taken care in selfish and brooding above :-(
Funny - NO way!! Even a turned off TV set is funnier than I am

Us

Another new occurence. Bro asked me for tips on going on a date! I could sense that the poor guy was blushing all over, as he asked me whether a "friend" should take flowers and what else, as it is a "serious date" date..lol. Of course, the facade couldn't last long and he shyly told me that the girl sits on his floor itself in office, and is "kinda weird but cool"... hahaha
I gave whatever tips I could, and that led him to ask how many dates had I been upto, acting too smart that I was. I told him countless, and that he shouldn't even get me started! And he left it there, sad creature that he is!
I was missing mom a lot yesterday night, so called today and told her so. She acts so cool nowadays, I was so pleasantly surprise when she said that we have to go wherever we have to, and that I will come stay with her when it is to be. I love my mom.

Forming beliefs

I find myself changed. Quite. From June, July, the last 9 months or so. My beliefs have shaped and firmed up a bit, half-baked they might still be, but there is some crystallisation.
Although they are so much based on borrowed ideas, ingrained in sessions of listening to someone with awe and undivided attention and love, they are now so much my own, and so different from where the chain of thought originally began.
but I dont have a laundry list...
I believe now, that the ability to care and be there for a loved one, is greater than love itself. The love of Jack and Ennis was great and epic and tragic, but thats what it was... care of the loved one unavailable when perhaps most essential, only a never ending longing. The care and "being there" is more important, even if it is a brother, and not your lover caring for you.
I also believe that inherently, people never change, never. If who you love, tries to keep changing to make you feel better, then he shall no longer eventually remain the person you loved anyway. If you keep wanting someone to change something or the other, realise it is the situation that you want to change, or yourself.

Troubled

Listening to a song from Junoon..

Kyon pareshaan hai tu... (Why are you troubled)
kayi jahaan aur bhi hain. (There are other worlds too)

Kitne...
Haseen aur bhi hain. (So many... deserving others too)

Too unoccupied to write?

Sometimes in life you get so confused with what all goes in your mind, that you don't know what to do. In my case, "sometimes" becomes "most of the time" and so, I am not even able to write my thoughts onto a post!
Lets see what has been happening.
Since coming back from Delhi, I have enjoyed myself quite a bit actually. Had a short play with mentally challenged children, had theatre friends come over for a full night out, went to an all-black guys' party and went berserk there, did a cool moonlit bicycle trip to a picturesque lake outside town again with theatre gang and celebrated Holi with friends - getting all wet and having loads of fun in wonderla amusement park.
The night out was absolute nonstop fun, with us playing odd card games and watching some obscure television, before venturing out late into the night. We played hopscotch (7 adults actually drawing a play-area and hopping in and out of it, that too at 2 in the night!! Crazy!!), then tried some tug-of-war before settling for our usual round of singing and dancing really late into the night. I'd really like to lose myself like this sometimes when you con yourself into believing you are a little kid out to play with friends, and there is nothing more to life than that really.
The guys party was great too, certainly the best i've attended so far! Got going on the dance floor and stuck on it with great company till the end... got a couple of brokeback posters as bonus too.

Oh my Gawd...

Your Seduction Style: Fantasy Lover

You know that ideal love that each of us dreams of from childhood? That's you! Not because you posess all of the ideal characteristics, but because you are a savvy shape shifter. You have the uncanny ability to detect someone's particular fantasy... and make it you. You inspire each person to be an idealist and passionate, and you make each moment memorable Even a simple coffee date with you can be the most romantic moment of someone's life By giving your date exactly what he or she desires, you quickly become the ideal lover. Your abilities to make dreams come true is so strong, that you are often the love of many people's lives. Your ex's (and even people you have simply met or been friends with) long to be yours. No doubt you are the one others have dreamed of... your biggest challenge is finding *your* dream lover.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

World View.. ahem

***Your World View***


You are a happy, well-balanced person who likes people and is liked by others.
You question whether many conventional views on morality are valid under all circumstances.
You are essentially a content person.

Sometimes, you consider yourself a little superior.
You are moral by your own standards.
You believe that morality is what best suits the occasion.

What Is Your World View?

Kissing purity!

Your Kissing Purity Score: 54% Pure

For you, kissing isn't a casual thing Lip to lip action makes your heart sing

Kissing Purity Test